10 reasons why I hate my job

1. I hate jack
2. The shift hours suck
3. I hate standing around for 6/7 hours being a hostess and doing nothing
4. The people I work with suck
5. I reak liek pasta and seafood when I leave
6. I hate Jack
7. I have to take a cab to work (what a waste of $)
8. When I bus I make crap tips
9. I get yelled at for not smiling enough
10. I hate Jack

current mood: crappy

WHO WAS THE LAST TO..
+ Slept in your bed: me
+ Saw you cry: Dana
+ Made you cry: Greg
+ Broke your heart: I don't know
+ Spent the night at your house: ummmmmm pagels kristen gill nicole and elysa back in like march lol
+ You went to the movies with: Greg
+ You went to the mall with: Greg
+ Yelled at you: my mom.. the awesome cunt
+ Sent you an e-mail: I dunno I never check it

HAVE YOU EVER..
+ Been to New York?: yes
+ Been to Florida?: yes
+ California?: yes
+ Hawaii?: no
+ Mexico?: no
+ China?: no
+ Canada?: yes
+ Danced naked?: in the facinity of my room..
+ Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day?: maybe?
+ Got a really bad feeling about something then it happened?: yeah
+ Wish you were the opposite sex?: nah just thought it would be cool not to have your period every month
+ Had an imaginary friend?: of course.. his name is mr. schnooks

FRIENDS....
x. best friend?: Nicoley Dana Kristen Pagels Elysa Christine Gill Katie Tom and Kaz
x. loudest?: Dana
x. funniest?: everyone in their own fucked up way =)
x. shyest?: Nicoley
x. craziest?: Elysa or Dana
x. quietest?: Nicoley
x. most random?: I dunno me? I think I say the stupidest stuff.
x. most emotional?: Nicoley
x. best singer?: Christine
x. smartest?: Elysa and Tom
x. sweetest?: everyone.. =)
x. do you miss?: Tom .. I don't see him as much =(
x. is basically family?: Katie
x. would die for you?: Probably no one
x. most athletic?: I don't really know.. out of the group either me or Gill?

SOME RANDOM:
+ Red or blue?: Red
+ Spring or fall?:  Fall
+ Santa or Rudolph?: Rudolph
+ Math or English?: both my best subjects but if one English
+ What are you going to do after you finish this survey?: find something to do tonight
+ What was the last food you ate?: popcorn
+ High school or college?: College.. my cunt of a mother isn't there
+ Are you bored?: yeah
+ How many buddies are on?: 74
+ Last noise you heard? music
+ Last time you went out of the state: Earlier this month
+ What do you think of ouija boards?: for 5 year olds
+ What book are you reading now?: I dunno I just finsihed Lovely Bones I have to save money to go buy some more.
+ What's on your mouse pad?: it's blue?
+ Favorite board game?: Parcheesi bitches!! I am the QUEEEN
+ Favorite magazine?: Architecture Digest
+ Worst feeling in the world?: Losing someone you love
+ What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: Is Greg up?
+ How many rings before you answer?: whenever
+ Future daughter's name: Lorali or Iris
+Future son's name: Jake or Terrance
+ Chocolate or vanilla?: Vanilla
+ Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?: no
+ If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be?:  Home designer.. not interior
+ Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous?: Righty
+ Do you type with your fingers on the right keys?: yeah
+ What's under your bed?: Architeture drawings and DDP drawings and some Blakc and white Photos from photography
+ Favorite sport to watch?: Baseball
+ Hair Color: Dark Brown
+ Eye Color: Hazel
+ Height Currently: 5 foot
+ Current Age: 16
+ Siblings: 1
+ Siblings Age: 19
+ Location: Office room
+ College: High school
+ Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Greggles <3
+ Hobbies: Soccer--Snowboarding--Greg-- Friends--Taking pictures-- Drawing houses--Reading
+ What Type Automobile Do You Drive: Chevy Blazer
+ Are You Timely Or Always Late: Always late
+ Do You Have A Job: yah.. hopefully a new one soon
+ Do You Like Being Around People: kind of

LOVE STUFF ~
+ Have you ever loved someone you had no chance with: No
+ Have You Ever Cried Over Something Someone of The Opposite Sex Did: yeah
+ Do You Have A "Type" Of Person You Always Go After: Yeah
+ Want Someone You Don't Have Right Now: Nope
+ Ever Liked a close Guy/Girl Friend: Yeah.. = /
+ Are You Lonely Right Now: Nope
+ Ever Afraid You'll Never Get Married: Who cares
+ Do You Want To Get Married: Maybe
+ Do You Want Kids: I hate kids.

FAVORITE
+ Room In house: My room
+ Type of music: Everything..
+ Song: I dont really think I have a favorite
+ Day Of The Week: Saturday
+ Color: Green
+ Flower: White Rose
+ Month: January
+ Season: Winter

IN THE LAST 48 HOURS, HAVE YOU:
+ Cried: No
+ Bought Something: Yes
+ Gotten Sick: No
+ Sang: Yes
+ Said I Love You: Yes
+ Wanted To Tell Someone You Loved them, But Didn't: No
+ Met Someone New: No
+ Talked To Someone: Yes
+ Had A Serious Talk: Yes
+ Missed Someone: Yes
+ Hugged Someone: Yes
+ Kissed Someone: Yes
+ Fought With Your Siblings: No
+ Dreamed About Someone You Can't Be With: No
+ Had a lot of sleep: No
+ Wanted This Survey To Be Over: Nah, it's occupying me

Yes or NO....
x. you keep a diary: No
x. you like to cook: chicken and baked potatoes are my speciality
x. you have a secret you have not shared with anyone: No
x. you fold your underwear: No
x. you talk in your sleep: People say I do sometimes
x. you set your watch ahead: Yes
x. you bite your fingernails: No
x. you believe in love: Yes

LAST:
x. movie you rented: I don't remeber
x. movie you bought: Mean girls I think..
x. song you listened to: OAR- About an hour ago
x. song that was stuck in your head: Motion City Soundtrack: Resolution
x. song you've downloaded: OAR- About an hour ago
x. CD you bought: I dunno that was months ago
x. CD you listened to: OAR
x. person you've called: Greggles
x. person that's called you: Greggles
x. TV show you've watched: I dunno
x. person you were thinking of: Greggles


HAVE YOU..
x. ever cried over a boy/girl: Yeah
x. ever lied to someone: Yeah
x. ever been in a fist fight: Yeah but I didn't throw any
x. ever been arrested: Nah

Number...
x. of times you have had your heart broken?: Twice
x. of hearts you have broken?: I don't know.. ask the exs
x. of people you consider your enemies?: A few
x. of people from high school that you have stayed in contact with?: I'm in high school right now
x. of times your name has appeared in the newspaper?: Never
x. of things in your past that you regret?:  A lot.. to much to count 

current mood: content

001) What time are you starting this?: 7:12 am
002) Name?: Lindsay
003) Date of birth?: January 19th 1989
004) Sex?: female
005) Height?: 5 foot.. fuck yeah for short people!
006) Eye color?: hazel
007) Weight?: 104.. i wish i was only 95 .. but i'm working on it
008) Location?: sayville.
009) Where were you born?: Central Islip...
012) Do you have crush on someone?:  I have a boyfriend
013) Do you have a bf/gf?: yes
014) If so, what is their name: Greggles
015) How long have you been together?: 4 months and  6 days =)
016) What are you wearing right now?: white shorts and a black tank top
017) Would you have sex before marriage?: yup
018) Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers?: no that's repulsive
019) Are you a virgin?: no
020) Do you smoke?: yeah
021) Do you drink?: yup.. it's good for the soul
022) Are you ghetto?: yeah i live in hardcore sayville who isn't ghetto?
023) Are you a player?: no
024) What are your favorite colors?: green and black
025) What is your favorite animal?: dog and elephant
026) Do you have any birthmarks?: no
027) Have you ever gotten your ass kicked?: yeah it was cool
028) Who are your best friends?: Melissa Nicole Dana Gill Elysa Kristen Christine Katie Tom Kaz
029) Have you ever beat someone up?: i'm against fighting
030) Who do you talk to most on the phone?: greggles i suppose
031) Have you ever been slapped?: by my mom.. fucking cunt
032) Do you get online a lot?: ehh not lately
033) Are you shy or outgoing?: outgoing
034) Do you shower?: of course not who does that?
035) Do you hate school?: i find it boring butstill important
036) Do you have a social life?: yeah...who doesn't?
037) How easily do you trust people?: not easily
038) Have you ever lied to your bestfriends?: I duno maybe a white lie but nothing bad 
039) Do you have a secret people would be surprised knowing?: I believe so
040) Would you ever sky dive?: no
041) Do you like to dance?: I danced for 8 years
068) Have you ever been out of state?: yes
069) Do you like to travel?: if it doesn't consist of planes
071) Have you ever been suspended from school?: nope
071) Do you want to get out of your hometown?: fuck yes! awaiting my college years
072) Are you spoiled?: probably, i jut don't want to admitt it
073) Are you a brat?: to my mom .. yes..
074) Have you ever been dumped?: yeah
075) Have you ever gotten high?: yeah
076) What's your favorite drink?: umm.. alcohol? Bud light or mikes hard cranberry lemonade.. non.. ummmmm ice tea
077) Do you like Snapple?: best stuff on earth
078) Do you drink a lot of water?: if it's soccer season.. yup
079) What toothpaste do you use?: crest?
080) Do you have a cell phone or pager?: cell phone
081) Do you have a curfew?: hmm sometimes.. matters who i'm with and what i'm doing
082) Who do you look up to?: people on HGTV and TLC
083) Are you a role model?: for women across america!
085) What name brand do you wear the most?: american eagle
086) What kind of jewelry do you wear?:  umm TIFANY'S Fuck yeah.. the only shit I wear bitchesss!
087) What do you have pierced?: 7 in the ears .. and i sued to have my belly but i think i'm getting it redone yay!
088) What do you want pierced?: my lip.. again  or my nose
089) Do you like taking pictures?: yes
090) Do you like getting your picture taken?: not really.. i always look gross
091) Do you have a tan?: ehh i'm tan all year I guess not supper tan but ya know not white.
092) Do you get annoyed easily?: hmm not really
093) Have you ever started a rumor?: no because rumors fucking suck
094) Do you have your own phone/phone line?: yeah
095) Do you have your own pool?: yes
096) Do you have any siblings?: 1 sister
097) Do you prefer boxers or briefs?: boxers.. briefs are ugly
98) Have you ever been played?: yeah.. thanks a lot christopher dudo
099) Have you ever played anyone?: no
100) Do you get along with your parents?: my mom is a cunt
102) How do you vent your anger?: yell and punch shit
103) Have you ever ran away?: no because i'd get in more fucking trouble
104) Have you ever been fired from a job?: no
105) Do you even have a job?: yeah
106) Do you daydream a lot?: yeah
107) Do you have a lot of exes?: you coudl say that
108) Do you run your mouth?: hmm yeah
109) What do you want a tattoo of?: star on my ankkle or a heart on my wrist where i have one kind of already but it's like tint skin cuz it's liek lead perment in my skin.. does that make sense?
110) What do you have a tattoo of?: none
111) What are your favorite flowers?: i don't really know.. white roses are nice.. but only white
112) What does your ex bf/gf look like?: which one?
113) What does your most recent crush look like?: my boyfriend
114) Have you ever been bitched out?: yeah
115) When was the last time you bitched someone out?: I dunno.. whil ago?
116) Are you rude?: my mom thinks i am but then again i think she's a cunt so i think it's fair
117) What was the last compliment you received: I like your new haicut
118) Do you like getting dirty?:  my nickname in soccer used to be Ms. Clean
119) Is your bellybutton an innie or outie?: innie
120) Are you flexible?: yeah..
121) What is your heritage?: Italian, German, Spanish and Puerto Rican
122) What is your lucky number?: 19
123) What does your hair look like right now?: down
124) Could you ever be a vegetarian?: no because my diet consist of only chicken
125) When was your last real heartbreak?: 7th grade
126) Describe your looks?: Dark brown hair, hazel eyes, 5 foot, muscular legs.. um that's it?
127) If you had to completely dye your hair it'd be what color?: light brown
128) Would you ever date someone younger than you?: prob not
129) Would you ever date someone older than you?: yeah
130) When was the last time you were drunk?: i dunno a month ago
131) When was the last time you went on a date?: Greggles took me out to lunch today.. does that count?
132) Would you rather give or receive oral sex?: recieve i guess.. i dunno it's both fun when you are horney
133) Have you ever given?: yes
134) Have you ever received?: yes
135) Have you ever had an eating disorder?: no
136) Do you have one now?: no
137) How many rings until you answer the phone?: when i get to it..
138) Have you ever been skinnydipping?: i dunno.. i don't think so
139) If yes, when was the last time?:
140) Do you look more like your mother or father?: my mom but i have my dad's round face with my mom features.. except i have someone elses nose neither of theirs.
141) Do you cry a lot?: hmm I dunno
142) Do you ever cry to get your way?: no
143) If you had to amputate one limb, what would it be?: my left arm
144) What phrase do you use most when on the phone?: none?
145) Are you the romantic type?: lol no
146) Have you ever been chased by cops?: no
147) What do you like most about your body?: nothing.. i'm ugly
148) What do you like least about your body?: my stomach
150) When was the last time you threw up?: last week?
151) In the opposite sex, do you prefer blondes or brunettes?: brunette
152) What do the shoes you last wore look like?: green flip flops
153) Do you ever wear shirts to show your belly?: ehh not really unless my shirt rides up
154) What about cleavage?: for my boyfriend
155) Is your best friend a virgin?: well some are.. some aren't
156) Have you ever fucked someone up?: no
157) Have you ever been fucked up?: kind of
158) What color are your underwear right now?: a gray thong with pink lace from the PINK line at Vistoria's secert =)
159) What theme does your room have?: green/black and wood
160) What size shoe do you wear?: 7 1/2
161) What jewelry are you wearing now?: my ring with peirdot (spelling?)stone, my Tiffany 3 disc necklace and my name braclet my sister got me =)
162) What is your screen name on AIM?: thedistortion19
163) Would you pick a wedgie in public?: if it was really pissing me off yeah
164) How are you feeling right now?: tired
165) When was the last time you were at a party?: Saturday night
166) Have you ever given a lapdance?: i dunno maybe
167) What do you sleep in?: underware and t-shirt
168) Has there ever been a rumor spread about you?: yes
169) What is one of your bad qualities?: tom says I critize everything
170) What is one of your good qualities?: i'm um i dunno cool?
171) Would you marry for money?: nah
172) What do you drive?: blazer or saturn
173) Have you ever given or received roadhead?: fuck yeah i gave it!  and fucking proud of it!!!
174) Are you more of a mama or daddy's child?: whoever is nice to me
175) When was the last time you cried in school?: like a month an half ago... we all know what that was over
176) Do you wear Chucks?: what are chucks?
177) For two million dollars, would you pose for Playboy?: fuck I'd do it for freee
178) What time are you finishing this?: 7:46

current mood: bored

Alright so Tom thinks I've turned into a different person.  Like I'm not the old Lindsay anymore.. do you think it's true? I dunno, sometimes I feel like I've changed but then I don't.  I'm not really sure.  Things that I used to care about, I couldn't give a shit anymore.   When I hear certain things I bursh them off after like 5 mins of dwelling on it... it's not like I can change if someone is mad at me so why dwell?  I dunno.. maybei'm different.. Kaz thinks he has to worry about me and Tom doesn't think I'm as upbeat as I used to ... ughhh I just wish I knew whether I really did change as a person or not.  Well comment if ya think I did, I'm really curious.  Mmmmkkkk byee...

I lovee my greggles =)

current mood: hopeful

Wow, you know what really makes this day even better than it already was... finding out my awesome so called friends were talking behind my back tonight because I wasn't there.  I really don't know why I give a shit anymore.  Fuuuuccckk that shittt.

Oh and tom is my new training partner so I get in shape for soccer. =)  Since he seems to be the only one that fucking cares.

Oh and Christine... boyfriends squared times whore equals good people??? lol oh jesus on my pancakes.

Annnddd. Kaz.. <3 you.. forget about them gay bitches! and don't worry about me .. mmk?

I'm not really sure what this entry is for.  I don't have much to say.  Last day of classes for em was last Thursday which was cool.  Am I aloud to say I'm a junior now or no?  It's so weird to think that HS is almost over.  Thank fucking god.  I can't wait to blow this popstickle stick.  Not literally but just get as far away as possible.   Hmm, I finished my table today after my final.  I'm gonna bring it home tomorrow .. maybe?  I'm so excited, I can't wait to um use it.  Wait.. how do you use a table?  Should I just put shit on it and say I use it or is there a specific secret way to use a table?  Hm.. something to ponder about people.  Oh.. and my boyfriend and his friends thought it was cool to go to the bunk house and he says he's not gay.  Sure gots me fooled.  Anyways I guess I don't have anything to say.. Adios =)

current mood: cheerful

Yeah.. I guess this is just another entry about what's going on in my mind.  The mind of Lindsay.  Not all that interesting but I'll tell you anyways.  It hurts, a lot.  Beyond knowing.  It's been what 2 weeks.  I don't know what to think or what to feel or see or understand.  I've never been so confused and broken in my life.  I'm changed, I'm a different person now than I was 4 months ago.  You are probably thinking how can someone change in such little time, but it's what happens in that little time that can make such a change.  I don't know why I'm writing this, I guess I'm just hoping maybe someone out there is going through the same thing as me and Dana, always hurting.  though we have different problems, we still know how each other feels.  Should I say thank you for changing me?  Or should I say Fuck you?  I'm not sure what's better, am I better or am I worse.. am I stupid or smart... am I brave or a coward?  I don't know, is this making me stronger or weaker?  I guess I want reassurance by people so I know I'm not fucking up my life more than I already have.  I mean I lay down in bed at night the first thing that pops into my head is him but then my mind goes a-wire and I start thinking about everything and then she pops in my head and I keep asking myself Where am I in this picture?  Shouldn't I be there somewhere, somewhere tucked away.  that's how it makes me feel like I'm worth-less, like an over used doll with bad hair and ripped clothes.  The kinds of dolls you play with for a week destroy and mutilate them and then throw them in the closet or in the attic and then you take them back out when you are bored.  I mean everything is good right now, he says he loves me, pays me so much attention but there is that part of me that still wants answers.  That still wants to be omniscient.  I don't know, why do I dwell on something that already happen that's supposedly over and down with.  I guess it's because in my mind, in my fucked up head it's not, it's still holding strong.  I wish I was strong like Dana.  God I envy her for it.  I envy Kristen for being able to date 1 guy for over a year and still have a great relationship.  God do I want that, I want to be strong and I want to be able to have a relationship and not have anything stupid fuck it up or hurt me.  Each of my friends have something I envy, I just wish I had those qualities too.  I guess I'm done.  I got my feelings out.  I love him I really do, but how do I know it's the right kind of love?

current mood: curious

I wished for love this year
It was granted 
And if that's tragic
Then let it be a tragedy.

Yeah shits been fucking up.  I guess this entry is about love and how it transforms life.  Reminds me of that english essay I wrote.  I'm not really sure what it is.  Maybe it's when you have it, it's the only thing you think of, the only thing you feel.  I don't think I make to much sense but I know someone understands.  I know she knows how I feel and I know how she feels.  When everything is going wrong, always feeling like it's your fault when you never did anything.  It's true, when shit goes wrong, I always feel it's my fault and I suppose I'm not alone on those feelings.  There's always that one person you can't help but love no matter what and that you can't love anyone else because you are so blinded by it.  What your heart desires is always tragic, no matter how you put it.  I don't really think this entry makes sense but it's about time I wrote something like it.  I ahve to say though that this entry is dedicated to Dana.. I love you and I'm always here for you, I promise.  I know how it is, trust me.

I love my boy. 

current mood: sleepy

hmmm.. I firmly think that high school is full of drama.  Oh wait.  I already knew that, damn.

Stop giving me the cold shoulder.  I didn't do anything wrong.

MMMKkkkk.. that's all I had to say..

current mood: giddy

To a selected few, you make me sick the way you act.  What bullshit, you make feel like shit.  Thanks.  And if you don't know who the fuck you are, you're stupider than you all look.  Have a peachy day. =)

Oh and thanks for not caring.

current mood: pissed off

So it's been some time since I've updated.  Most of you know the shit that's been going down.  I'm still major upset, I still can't help but cry.  For about a week, I haven't gotten much sleep.  It's killing me, I wake up go to school come home get upset never sleep or I wake up go to school come home go to work get upset don't sleep.  There seems to be a trend going here.  I demand some damn sleep.  So whatever, that's not even my main concern.  My main concern is finding out who is lieing and who isn't.  It's like I need to buy a fucking lie detector test.  So I still haev no idea what to do.  I mean everyone is like "Don't do it Lindsay, don't go back, you deserve better."  I just, I dunno I see someone else when I'm with him.  He's different around me.  He opens up more I suppose.  He shows me how he feels about shit.  He supposedly doesn't show his friends and tries to act all non-chalant about everything, even though he says how upset and pissed off he is about the situation.  I don't know.  Do I believe shi friends who said they asked him "Do you really love Lindsay?"  and Greg saying "No."  or do I believe him when he tells me "Lindsay, I love you so much, you're the only one I want to be with."  It's sooo hard, you have no idea.  I love him to death, but you can't do this to me and think it's okay.  So much has been going through my head, it's all I thnk about.  It's driving me nuts.  I haven't gone to too many classes the past week because of this.  My guidence counseler exempt me from classes on Wednesday because all I was doing was crying and I couldn't even do the work in class.  I just sat there crying, pretty much motion-less.  You'd think I would have known not to let this happen.  I'm always fucking getting screwed over whenever I'm in love.  You aren't the only one who had liked someone else before we dated, I mean god.  That's where we are different, I didn't think about him anymore because I was soo infautated with Greg, he was never on my mind.  Yet she was on his.  Makes me feel like complete shit.  What, I'm not good enough?  Obviously I suck at life, since I can't even make one person happy.  I pretty much feel worthless, as if I never mattered in the first place.  Ugh, I feel pathetic sitting here still dwelling on it.  God and I feel even worse because I'm dragging Dana into it by always talking and telling her everything and I dunno.  I just wanna say THANKS DANA!, that's one great friend to sit here and listen to me cry for hours and to try and make me feel better.  I know I have to make this descion for myself but it's so difficult because if I go back I look weak and insecure.  Let me tell you, those are 2 things I'm definetely NOT.  I jsut want to make the right descion but I have no idea what it will be.  What if I don't take him back and I missed out on the greatest thing in the world.  He makes me so happy, when I see him inside I can't help but smile and think about all the good stuff.  Right now I'm supposed to be "furious" at him, but I'm a sucker, I forgive everyone.  I can't hold grudges.  Then there is what if I take him back and he cheats on me again or does something to ruin shit again.  It's like a lose-lose situation.  I don't know.  I have to think about shit more, I mean I know which way I'm leaning towards but I need more re-assurance.  Once I have that, then I'll know.  Ugh, if you read this, don't interpert it the wrong way and be gay about it. MMMkkk.. This will be the end I suppose.  If you have advice.  Comment please.

Wake up, thought that I might have the strength to carry on
Wake up, turns out that I'm barely barely holding on
**Motion City Soundtrack**

current mood: crushed

So yeah vacation was decent I guess.  Not going to get into it because you know, it's personal.  Can't have you knowing everything.  So Today I went on a book shopping spree =)  Oh mann it was soooooo good.  I went to the bookstore in town to see Melissa and to see if I could find a book I found 3, I got one free and paid for the other 2, but I only gave her 12 bucks when it was liek supposed to be 17 lol.  Oh well.   Then my dad came home, I lied and said I didn't find anything so he'd take me to borders and buy em more books haha.  I'm sooo pathetic but I love it.  So I went to borders and got 3 more books, we actualyl had to pay for all of them though.  Damn.  So yeah 6 new books plus Mr. Shaw's is 7.  I'm set for liek maye a week or 2.  Which is pretty damn pathetic of me.  So yeah.. I mean that's not that interesting to anyone but me but whatever. 

OH IF ANYONE KNOWS ANY GOOD TUNES FOR ME TO BOBB MY HEAD WITH WHILE LISTENING TO MY IPOD PLEASE TELL ME SOME.  I NEED SOME NEW STUFFF. =)

oh and I love my babe <3

current mood: cheerful

Oh the gayness.  I can't really say why I'm a loser, because it's embarressing that I'm being stupid.  So I'm gonna put it in code form.  I'm gonna use *** for what it means.  If you're smart you'll figure it out.  So yeah I've never been so *** before in a relationship.  Ya know how most poeple are, I never was.  So, I'm freaknig out a little bit, because it's abnormal for me to act like this.  I can't help it though, the thought of it makes me cringe.  Every time I see someone, I get soo *** even if I don't know them.  It's driving me nuts.  I think he knows but I'm not sure.  I don't want him to know, 'cause you know, it's embarressing.  Msot people are *** in relationships but I mean it's stupid and I never really thought of it as a possiblity for myself until lately.  I'm gonna shut up because this entire entry doesn't even fucking make sense to anyone but me.  Okay.. I'm done.

current mood: curious

Ughh.. I feel so sick.  Anyways.. Sunday was Kristen's party.  It was fun, after such a shitty day on Saturday I really neeeded it.  We played baseball.  Gill cheated and threw the ball at me to get out me and yeah it was a REAL fuckign baseball!!!  So yeah and we came back and watched the incredibles!!!! hahaha I LOVE that movie.  But like Dana called me 4 times and I got the message at the end of the night, I feel special cuz she called me. =)  But Anyways she was upset and let me tell you.  If that little fucker screws shit up again.  I'm getting a bat and fucking his face up.  I love Dana =). So then Monday we went to Kristen and Gill's LAX game.. It was sooo cold.  They won though and they both played great!!! Kristen scored a goal on her actual birthday!  lol  So me and Greg are I guess back to normal?  It seems okay.  There isn't much else to say.

current mood: pissed off