Sunday, November 9th, 2008
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4:11 am - the walking mind - dying one day at a time.
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These Are the times to remember.
for some reason it keeps running through my head. i am not sure why but some times i get this euphoric feeling about how my life is despite the burdens like work. i am doing great in my life i feel i am way better off then most people and it makes me feel like i am egotistical or just full of myself but i just feel like it is all working out. i own my car even though it is 10 years old and aging. i own my house despite it is a trailer and i don't own the land. i have an occupation not a job i am a cook and i DO know what i am doing despite i hate where i work and i can't find another job for now. i am smart and can do near everything. i built a great portion of my house. i may weigh 202 lbs but i don't look it and i am more athletic than most. i am strong and have great stamina. i have good hair i am not balding nor should i due to genetics. i don't look to bad either i may not win any modeling rolls but i am not going to be scaring off children at a glance. i am not afraid to do things and takes obstacles as a challenge. i never done drugs i don't smoke and never plan to. i may drink but it is seldom but i can still drink a lot under the table. i can be a great friend or a great enemy. i can think on my feet and am good at improv when i need to. i can easily get along with people i want to. i live with the i can do anything mentality and i hope it lasts for ever. i might get mad at some times but it isn't at people but rather situations. i am the walking hypocritical stubborn asshole self contradiction and i am proud of that. if i don't like you i'll tell you and i wish people would return the favor. i may not know everything but i am quick-witted enough to make you think i do. i am honest and rarely ever lie in fact i like to say i never do but we all will once in a while. i have great hand eye coordination and really fast. i have great balance and like to use it. i have stories and theories. i am a teacher to thoughs who are willing to listen. i love to talk and listen i want to share, and love to help. as the time goes bye you may lose touch with me and never see me again but you will remember me. even if you don't remember my name you will remember the guy with long hair that made you think and helped you when you needed it. i made many accomplishments and will continue to make more. i just feel like i have a better grasp on the world than most and feel like i am down right better than everyone else and that scares me. i don't like to feel like i am better then others but as i get to know people i always return to that type of thinking. i like individual persons but hate people. i want to learn from you but i will keep my own veiw of the world. the best part of me and my world, the one thing that tops all that. in fact the reason i now start to see these things and what keeps me going and trying is Heather. the more i think about it all. the more i try to figure things out i keep coming to the idea it all started with her. i liked a lot of my life doing well but always felt like my mind was cloudy and missing something. but a little over 2 years ago when Heather and i started to go out my mind started to clear up. i have the best girlfriend ever. she is perfect even though she might not see it. i have the best love ever. i don't know what really got me to type this. but from that one saying this all came. These ARE the times to remember. you need to know who you are what you can do and what you have done. you need to be thankful for all you have and all you will do. you need to have a plan and need to know it will not fall in your lap you must work for it. i don't get things handed to me i have to work for it. i am grateful for that. you got to earn what you have. coasting through life is not life at all. you may have done a lot but you can always do more. you can work harder and can do better. you need to know to not look at the staircase but just the step in front of you. as you take each step you don't realize how close to the top you get. from the outside looking in you may not see all this you may not know anything, you may think i am just sitting a round but you will never know. you only know what people let you know and everyone makes assumptions. i will go on with my life trying harder and harder i have things to do. i have plans. timing may have slowed things down but you need to wait till it is right to move. you need to deal with the snags and realize if they need more time to work out. live life enjoy love and share stories. you only got one life to live and immortality is gained through sharing what you did with it. so do what you can, talk to who you can and share your lessons. teach with a wise lessen and a light touch. you will never understand it all and maybe you are not meant to but in the end it needs to be done. i just wish i can make everyone understand. i wish i could inspire everyone. i want to touch everyone and get them to think but we can only do so much. a life time is long and you can do a lot. i need to improve the world even if it is only my world the people i met and the ones that let me talk to them. the things i've done goes beyond my years. and i hope i can continue that path.
so this is my mental dump a rare expression of what i am and my thoughts. this is my life these are the times to remember.
PS: don't look to far into this don't assume more from this than just a mental dump. nothing is going on i just felt like typing something. something that is just typed with no pre-thought. life is great.
current mood:  accomplished
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(comment on this)
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Sunday, September 28th, 2008
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2:26 am - random thought
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love is being thankful to someone for just being alive for another day.
current mood:  philosophical
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(comment on this)
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Saturday, September 27th, 2008
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7:22 am - one of the funniest things ever.
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Sunday, August 24th, 2008
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11:12 pm - The New Addition
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Tuesday, August 19th, 2008
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3:37 am - way way way over due
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just so you know. i think most already do by now. i am in my house and gots the internet. i am working on getting everything organized and situated. i still got a lot a head of me but it is getting there. i am fine and awaiting what happens after this lovely storm. until then.
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(comment on this)
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Saturday, June 28th, 2008
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12:04 am - here i go...
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I am hoping to be in my new place by sunday. this means as it usually does that i may be relatively out of contact for several weeks. my cell will be active but all my cable stuff will not till i can pay the late fee i wrangled up. at this point my floor is complete and primed (just finished the 3rd coat). so all that is left is to build the walls put up the drywall lay the carpet add plumbing and move everything over and all in just one day. after everything is settled down i will take back up carpet in some rooms permanently secure in others fix any holes and put a new sealer coating on the roof. rebuild celling rebuild all the walls build cabinets and anything else i seemed to miss. i got the place for $1200 added about another $1200 for repairs and i got about another $2000 to make it look pretty. i am hoping to get everything done in about 3 months maybe 4. after that i am hoping to make plans for a house warming party. so maybe we'll make it a christmas party.
well this is my goodbye for now, i'll try to keep everyone posted with any updates... and issues i am having and for anyone wondering, YES i am taking picture to let everyone see the progress. i may even make it into a larger timeline picture of what i went through.
best of luck everyone, see-you later.
current mood:  exhausted
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(1 comment | comment on this)
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Monday, June 23rd, 2008
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2:24 am - OH MY FUCKING GOD NO!!!!
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Friday, June 13th, 2008
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9:34 pm - just a little over the top i think
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Wednesday, June 11th, 2008
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2:31 am - i just have to post this.
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Tuesday, June 3rd, 2008
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3:10 am - this just seemed interesting.
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Wednesday, February 27th, 2008
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2:16 am
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Friday, January 4th, 2008
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7:23 am - interesting
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Thursday, October 25th, 2007
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1:38 am - ...
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Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007
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2:17 am - rather interesting.
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Saturday, October 20th, 2007
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7:31 am - got to love his reaction
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Wednesday, October 10th, 2007
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3:34 am - OMGWTFBBQ!!!111!!456R!A!N!!D!!!O!MS!!TU!F!F!!
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Sunday, October 7th, 2007
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11:20 pm - my turn
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Friday, October 5th, 2007
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12:18 am - new depp movie.
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Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007
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1:58 am - this seams rather interesting.
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Tuesday, September 18th, 2007
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1:38 am - nuff said
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silence
