| Philips Are Twats | ||||
| 04:00pm 19/06/2004 | ||||
Well, I wasn't intending on giving an extremely long rant on my lack of MP3 player. It's not like I can afford a new one straight away, anyway, because the decent ones are like £100+ and I have thirty squid on me and £3.79 in my bank. Woah, I really need a job. Alas, I am too lazy. Plus, I doubt Philips can help me. What can they answer with? "Your MP3 player is not working because it is a piece of crap." Hmmmm...doubtful. Last exam on Monday. Woooo. I am definitely not gonna revise. Can't be arsed. Plus it's DT, which is piss easy, so there's no point really. Prom on Saturday. Oh goody. Not. Can't believe I'm going. What a load of bollocks. Trapped in a room for six hours with no alcohol and about two hundred people whom I despise. Sounds ace!! Learnt a new word today; Anglophile. Apparently, it is someone who has a deep admiration from England, it's people and culture. Hmmm...Anglophiles sound creepy. Why would you admire a bunch of people just because of their nationality? There are twats all around the world and England holds the most of them, in my opinion. Then again, maybe I just live in a crappy part of England. Figures. I wish I could do something, y'know, like a talent. Yeah, I wish I was talented. I am entirely non-musical and can barely play the keyboard, so that's a no-go. I am quite intelligent, but there's always going to be someone brainier. I'm a bit of a twat, but there's always someone...twattier. I'm very wierd, but there's always someone wierder. Hmmm...maybe my search for a talent is hopeless. Was wondering yesterday how many times people have seen The Lord Of The Rings at the cinema. I saw Fellowship seven times and Two Towers about eighteen, but only because it was ace. The Gollum scene...wow. I love Gollum. I want one of those cardboard cut outs. Almost nicked one from Woolworths when extended Two Towers DVD was released, but I thought better of it. After all, it wouldn't be hard for security to catch up with me when I'm trying to drag a huge Gollum thing through the middle of town. It also wouldn't be that inconspicuous. You can buy them from cardboardcutout.net for £24.99. There are two; a Gollum and a Smeagol. Personally, the Smeagol one looks creepier than the Gollum one. There is no way I'm spending seventy five squids (cos I'd have to buy a Spidey one too) on cardboard cut outs. Plus, whenever I woke up or walked into my room I'd shit myself when I saw them, thinking someone is in my room. That would not be amusing. I've been writing sixteen minutes. I must be quite a slow typer, cos I haven't written much. Need credit for phone, Kay's present and wrapping paper. Just thought I'd share my mental list with you, DJ. I've been away from school for three days and I am already dithering and bored. How fucked up is that? I seriously need a job, just to occupy myself. I've already read Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire and Feather Boy in these three days. I always read when I'm bored. Feather Boy was really good, but the ending was bollocks. It could've been better. The boy who played it on TV, although I didn't see the series, is so cute. He was in Love Actually (shit movie) and was so cute. I believe I am repeating myself. Plus, I am calling a pre-teen 'so cute'. This must indicate my time to leave. Laters |
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crappy| Ha Ha | ||||
| 05:55pm 14/06/2004 | ||||
What a result!! Even though it's gonna screw up the layout, nevermind. A really good friend of mine was sexually assaulted on Friday at 5 fucking pm. It was still frigging light. It was also in a public park. She managed to get away before anything else really happened and, as she only lived 100 yards away from her home, her dad saw her and went to the park. The twat who attacked her was still there! What a fucker. Apparently he raped a girl in Leeds an hour before. I can't believe. What a twat, and what unusal circumstances. You don't expect it to happen in broad daylight in a public frigging park. She's alright though. In fact, she seems fine. I was so shocked. There are some right arseholes in the world. |
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cynical| About Time | ||||
| 04:59pm 11/06/2004 | ||||
Ah, Maths. All I can say is fuck me. I didn't know an answer to one single question, not even the first few easy ones. It was fucking hard. I just scribbled down tonnes of working out and am hoping for the best. I am also hoping the Calculator paper will be as easy as...well, something extremely easy. Can't believe the school use Edexcel exams, though, they're for like extra brainy people, so I didn't really have a chance. Am quite confident about English, but I can never be too sure on how well I did in English exams, they're fickle. Wow, what a cool word; fickle. Ahem, anyway, I think I did pretty well. I just hope I can beat my mock scores of A*'s, because getting lower in the actual exam would be really embarrassing. Plus, people expect it of me and I really hate that, because even if I get an A, which is excellent (in my opinion) it won't be an A* and people will be disappointed. That's really screwed up, cos an A is really good and I'll be estatic, but I know people will be all wierd. Anyway, that's exam talk over with. How frigging boring am I? Although, I couldn't contain my surprise on how easy they are!! I also discovered that she is cutting herself, and I'm really torn. I don't know what to do. If I say something I could offend her, but if I don't... I also have a habit of talking a load of crap so I could make it worse. Urgh, I dunno what to do. I guess I'll just have to think about it. || Me || |
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contemplative| Crap Balls | ||||
| 05:47pm 01/06/2004 | ||||
Wooo. I was actually quite worried that I wasn't worried...if that makes sense. But now I am worried so that is OK, 'cos now I feel normal. Though I forgot how much I hate worrying, so I'm kinda berating myself for being worried that I wasn't worried. And now I'm worried that I am worried 'cos I can't sleep. But I just can't be arsed to revise. Did some Geography and Maths today and yesterday. Kinda worried that I've only done two, when I have twelve exams left. Though I won't revise for English or French because I don't need to and I will hardly revise for RS or DT, because they are easy as...well, something easy. So that leaves Science, Maths and Geography. Wooo, so I have actually started two thirds of my revision. I feel much better now. Funny how writing a load of bollocks can have that effect. |
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| I Knew I Was Spider-Girl!! | ||||||
| 02:10pm 27/05/2004 | ||||||
From Go-Quiz.com I knew it! I am Spider-Girl! Was in Asda today and saw some Frosties and the free toy was a Spiderman thingy, but it was so crap! It made me want to cry! On the bright side, persuaded my mum to buy me some Spiderman spaghetti. She said I was too old, but I said "Spiderman fans are never too old." I'm kinda worried about Sarah. Recently she's been going to a doctor, as in shrink, at least I think it's a shrink anyway. She's honest about her depression and she was saying how she keeps getting different pills but none of them work. I just thought she was depressed, but I think she might be self-harming. A couple of months ago she said how she got scratched by all these safety pins, and her arms were all scratched. She even showed me at school, but now she keeps getting more and says it's her cat or whatever. But her cat doesn't scratch. In fact, her cat is so frigging fat I'm surprised it can walk. Plus, whenever I go to her house her cat is, well, overly friendly. I remember one time it lay on me for ages, like four hours, and drooled all over me. Yes, her cat dribbled on me. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is her excuses are really crap. I mean, she dropped open safety pins on her and they scratched her arms really bad? Surely they wouldn't have hurt without some pressure? I really don't want her to hurt herself. How can I say something though? "Yo Sarah, how's the self-harming going? I think you should stop." Even if I said that I doubt it'd affect her. Obviously she's upset with some aspect of her life. I just want her to know I'm here for her. Damn my lack of communication. I am the crappest sentimentalist ever. I just can't do it. I'm not much of a mushy, caring person. Bleh. It's just been annoying me. On a different note, I can't wait for Harry Potter 3. I guess that makes me a retarded geek, but nevermind. I love geeks. They're sexy. Something about those glasses and the lankiness. Mmmmm.. And no, that was not sarcasm. |
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curious| What A Twat | ||||
| 07:24pm 26/05/2004 | ||||
Twats |
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| For Fuck's Sake | ||||
| 06:35pm 23/05/2004 | ||||
I don't know what the fuck's happening, but it is seriously retarded. Fucking hell! |
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| What The Fuck?! | ||||
| 04:03pm 15/05/2004 | ||||
First Random Grave: "OMG! OMG! My spray on tan looks awful! And prom is today! I feel like crying!" Of course, I nearly scratched my eyes out when reading this, but managed to resist. Then I tried RGing again... Second Random Grave: "I have a boyfriend! His name starts with a 'T' and ends with 'yler'!!!!!! Can you guess???!!! I'm sooooooooo happpy! YAYAYAYAY!" My eyeballs are now on my bedroom floor, and I'm frantically trying to wash the blood from my nails. Why the fuck do people like that live? Has nobody shot them yet? And if not; why the fuck not?! Urgh, what twats. It should be a crime to be that cheerful about obtaining a boyfriend (especially one named 'Tyler') and being so upset over a fake tan *shudder* spray that has gone wrong. Twats, twats, twats. As you can see, DJ, I am in a fabulous mood. Laters |
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pissed off| Hmmm... | ||||
| 06:57pm 14/05/2004 | ||||
I worry what I've done to that girl. Before she met me she daren't even say the word 'shit'. Now she's...well, now she's mental. Had another wierd dream last night, except it wasn't cute like the other one. Nor was it a wet 'wetless' dream. Basically, I pushed my teacher out of the door, so he wrote up an incident report and I needed to sign it. But I refused and skived the rest of school. What a waste of a dream Laters! |
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| Peculiar | ||||
| 05:50pm 12/05/2004 | ||||
It was so wierd though, otherwise it wouldn't have been one of my dreams. I dreamt I was running in a field, although it was really dark I could see really well and a huge white sheet seemed to cover the entire field. Anyway, I was running around for no apparent reason and bumped into this really cute boy from school. I fell over and he bent down to help me up, then he snogged me. Finally, I get some action in my dreams. This is the closest I've ever come to an erotic dream, which kinda sucks cos I want one. Kinda like a wet dream without the wetness, obviously. What really rocked, though, was that the cute feeling made me in such a good mood when I wake up. Like when the emotion from your dream follows you through to when you wake. Usually I end up with the urge to cry, or check my teeth are still there (I have a lot of teeth-losing dreams) Anyway, yes, I was in a super nice mood today and I wasn't my usual bitchy self. Kate was quite disappointed; we didn't bitch about anyone much, which is like the basis of our friendship. Well, yes, I really should be revising for exams but can't be arsed. Had my oral yesterday, but that went crap. For the role play, which you can't prepare for, I thought my teacher said 'What would you like to eat tomorrow?' so I replied with 'I would like a hamburger, please' (in french though, obviously). Only when I left the exam did I realise he'd asked me what I wanted to do today. Therefore my answer made no sense and was kinda freaky, as well. Also, he asked me what I bought my mum for her birthday. Instead of jewellry I said a jewellry store. He replied with 'Very generous!' How shameful. Only 15 more exams to go! Laters |
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happy| My Alter Ego | ||||
| 07:45pm 05/05/2004 | ||||
I'm such a retard, but I enjoy my retardedness. Of course, that makes me even more of a retard but hey! I enjoy it! Which makes me even more of a retard. Etcetera and so forth. I'm blah. Blah blah blah. I'm only writing here 'cos I'm bored. Gonna miss Jenny when she leaves (13 days!). Wish I could swap her so that she stays and some twat goes. If only. I've realised that I'm quite an arrogant, hateful, self-centered, vain, cynical and cocky individual. Actually I haven't just realised it, I've only just accepted it. How frigging strange. Got an email today how a fucking huge spider that lives in Iraq. It is huge. Fucking huge. Not much else about Me xxx xx x |
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| Je deteste francais | ||||
| 02:12pm 01/05/2004 | ||||
Yes, I have my French oral in a week and trying to cram french into my minute, sleep-deprived brain is really hard. Plus, I have my music on, which doesn't help much. But it's hard to revise without background noise...except I really like this playlist so it's more like...foreground noise. I'm gonna miss everyone when school finishes. Loadsa people are leaving. I suppose I should be sad...but I'm not, because a lot of twats will be leaving as well. This makes me happy. Dunno how I'm suppose to beat my A*'s for english. I know I'll get lower, which means I did crap, even if it's an A. I would have preferred to get like a C in my mocks then the A* in my actual exam. Maybe if I break my arms or something before the exam, then they can use my mock results! But that is not a good idea, because then they'd use my mock results for everything and that would not be good. Well, yes, thought I'd share with you how much I despise French. I am not french, therefore I can not speak french. Likewise, I do not have a french accent. Speaking french with a Yorkshire accent is quite laughable, which is why I always grin insanely in my orals. Oooo, orals. Heehee. God, I am immature and I love it! Laters |
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working| I Knew It Wouldn't Last | ||||
| 07:46pm 13/04/2004 | ||||
I don't know what was wrong last entry, but I'm feeling much better. Perhaps it's because I'm a teenager. Or maybe it's because I'm a girl. Or maybe it's because I'm a teenage girl. Either that, or I am seriously fucked in the head. My bouts of depression only last about a few days, then I'm fine, until the next time. It's really wierd. Ah, at least I'm not some annoyingly happy kind of twat that thinks everything is great and smiley. Fucking hell, that would be awful! Hmmm...or maybe my period is due. I PMS really bad. What a retard I am. 'Til next time |
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| Fucking Hell | ||||
| 08:21pm 11/04/2004 | ||||
I need...something. I hate fucking feeling like this. I feel so lonely, like there's just a big empty space. Once again, I can't see a future. I can't see past my GCSE's. What am I going to do with my life? What is the point? I just don't understand what's brought this on. I was perfectly happy. I don't know what's wrong, and this is what fucks me off the most. If I don't know what's wrong, I can't help myself. If I don't know what's wrong, I can't ask others for help. I wish someone would come online, just so I can act like I normally do. So I can mess around, forget about it all. I don't even know what I wanna fucking forget about. I'm so messed up it's unbelievable. I hope I feel different in the morning. I know I won't sleep, I'll end up watching music channels. Probably search for some heavy, depressing music and wallow in self-pity. I don't know what is happening to me. |
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| Blah | ||||
| 12:52pm 09/04/2004 | ||||
All I seem to do when I'm not at school is watch movies (no matter how shite they are), read books (always seems to be the Harry Potter/LOTR ones...why? I do not know) or sleep. Speaking of sleep, I had a very strange dream. I dreamt I was hiding under a desk with Billy Boyd. We were then seen, so jumped out of a window and into a conveniently close wood. There we hid, whilst the people whose desk we were under looked for us. Then I woke up. Very strange. My neck aches so bad. Went on every ride yesterday; Air was awesome. As was Oblivion, but only because it provoked such profanity when I neared the drop that even I was appalled. And that is something. It seems I have nothing to write about now that I am not depressed. It's strange. Not as strange as my dream, but still strange. I can't get over how fucked up that dream was. Very wierd. Laters |
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blah| Cheerios | ||||
| 07:26pm 07/04/2004 | ||||
Well, keeping up with my 'happy' vibe (three days straight!) I decided to spruce you up, dear DJ, since you're the only one (well...thing) I divulge everything to. Well, also Tanya, as she is the only one who knows of you so therefore can read it but I don't mind. I prefer her knowing all angles of my dark yet shallow mind. Love ya, Tanya! Yes...the theme is the lickable Dominic Monaghan. Mmmm...I wouldn't mind sucking his lollypop... *Ahem* Anyway, going to Alton Towers tomorrow! Woot! Never actually been before, so I am going to go on every fucking ride there is. I love rollercoasters...they give me such an adrenaline rush. I also love those rides that drop you for what seems like ages then suddenly stop before repeating it all again. Sure, you're facial expression is akin to the one you might have when enduring constipation but the rush! I imagine bungee jumping would be like that, except much much much more heightening. Which is why I'd love to bungee jump; one of my aspirations! Did some revision today. Well, actually just copied up my exam time table and typed out my French speaking conversations (4/6 actually) then stuck them to my roof so when I'm in bed I can read them. Granted, when I'm in bed I either watch TV, read a book or sleep....but it made me feel like I was doing something and, let's face it, this is what I'm going to be doing until a few weeks before actual exams. Then I'll be like 'Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit.' But, until then, I couldn't give a fuck. Hmmm...still not sure on that prom dress. It's too...bleh for me. It's just not me. Dresses, period, are not me...but they're compulsory. I don't even want to go to the prom but it's seen as 'anti-social' to not go. Me? Anti-social? Pah! Love and licks |
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bouncy| Onwards With The Sappy, Sickly Crap | ||||
| 05:30pm 06/04/2004 | ||||
Hmmm...babysat last night. The Hot N Sweaty forum blocked up my inbox. Will have to change individual emails to a weekly email. Found out that I am the youngest. Does that make me more perverted? God, I hope so. It's my claim to fame! Wow, trying to prove that I am not a miserable bastard is going to be harder than I thought! Ooooo! Exciting news flash! I have a.... !PLAN! Yes, that's right! After my GCSE's (seven weeks and I'm not running around like a headless chicken...strange) I am going onto A-Levels...then I am taking a gap year in America! Of course, I need to work my lazy arse off until then. Also, going to Alton Towers on Thursday with new rich brother. He's not a new brother, just newly rich. It fucking rocks! ---End Of Happy Transmission--- |
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crazy| OH YEAH! | ||||
| 09:33pm 04/04/2004 | ||||
!!!OH YEAH!!! *ahem* Just had a thought; why should I make my journal happy? I only have an urge to tell my feelings when I have feelings. So...basically, I only need to write when I'm fucked off. If I wanted to write down shit when I was elated, that would make me one wierd twat. So yes, my retardness is justified! More twatty, pathetic and fucked-off posts guaranteed to come soon! |
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| Glastonbury | ||||
| 09:40am 02/04/2004 | ||||
Why don't people stop trying to access the website and let me get the goddamn tickets?! Jeebus, don't they have work/school/sleep?! I woke up especially to do this! I'm even skiving off school, but nooooooooooooo, no tickets for me. I've realised that I only write in this thing when I am depressed or fucked off. Or self-pitying, come to think of it. It makes me look a bit like a twat. See, I'm doing it again. Oh dear. Well, yes, I just came to rant about Glastonbury since no one else I know really gives a shit about my lack of tickets (they have no taste. Who would not want to go see live music and entertainment for three straight days without a shower? It's the epicentre of living!) Beam me up, Scotty |
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annoyed| Grrr | ||||
| 08:14pm 16/03/2004 | ||||
One is a moody twat who doesn't know how to have fun and the other is a liar who makes up the most unbelievable, ridiculous lies. Give me a loaded gun with two bullets. Actually, I only need one since they're attached head to arse. Ingrates. Fuck them both. I am better than them. I'm more intelligent. I'm funnier and I am definitely more attractive than the spotty, obese whales. Yes, I can't wait until July. |
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creative|
bananafairy |
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